"It isn't the mountains ahead to climb that wear you out; it's the pebble in your shoe."
my name is Clare Deatker
I am a certified executive and cognitive behavioural coach and a Member of The Association of Coaching.
As a qualified solicitor with over ten years experience of working within large City firms, I am able to offer specialised coaching to all professionals within the legal profession in particular, as I understand at first hand the increasing demands placed upon lawyers from trainees right through to Partners. I specialise in supporting my clients as they gain greater self awareness and focus in a non-judgmental space, enabling them to gain clarity and explore different possibilities and choices for themselves. By learning how to draw on their own resources to manage and respond to stress, resilience and confidence grows enabling them to move forward to fulfil their true potential in both their professional and personal lives.
Would you like to gain the confidence and clarity to takestock of your life ?
why not book your 30 minute complimentary introductory coaching session (via phone, Zoom or Skype)?
This is the perfect opportunity for us to get to know each other a little and for me to fully understand what you would like to achieve through our coaching sessions. I can explain to you the cognitive behavioural foundation of my coaching approach and explore the ways I can fully support you as you move towards achieving your goals.
a little about me ...
Clare Deatker MA (Cantab) MAC
I live near Guildford in Surrey, with my husband and two teenage sons.
Through my experience of working in three leading law firms in London including Allen & Overy, I am able to provide invaluable support to busy and ambitious female lawyers in particular, as they navigate themselves through the many transitional periods that the majority of women will pass through during their professional lives. Marriage, starting a family, returning to their careers after maternity leave or a longer career break are just some of the life events that professional women face as they try and build a sustainable and rewarding career.
By empowering women to identify and clarify their own career and personal goals, they become more self aware and not only grow in confidence but learn how to draw on their own resources to build their resilience to enable them to gain greater clarity, gain momentum and move towards achieving their life goals.
What is coaching?
When I get asked that question, the following key themes come to mind:
Short Term . Goal and Solution Orientated . Holistic . Practical .
Challenging . Interactive . Engaging . Empowering .
my personal coaching approach
I am passionate about helping others, just like me, to reap the benefits from the transformative effects of integrating both cognitive behavioural strategies and mindfulness practices into their lives as essential life skills. I have a genuine and authentic interest in people and gain great personal satisfaction from supporting others gain clarity and insight into their own lives enabling them to make the necessary changes to open up a more balanced, purposeful and meaningful life for themselves.
I have helped clients break through the obstacles that seem to be holding them back in their lives. Life is too short to let your lack of confidence prevent you from setting exciting goals for yourself, or to settle for a life that lacks direction or purpose. I offer a warm, trusting and non-judgmental space in which my clients can do just that.
Do any of these obstacles resonate with you?
fear . lack of confidence . procrastination . perfectionism . stress . anxiety . unrealistic expectations. excuses . just don't know where to start . self doubt . self sabotaging behaviour .
why would I benefit from a coach?
become more self aware and embrace life’s challenges
Life throws many surprises at us, and whilst we cannot predict the outcome of any situation, we do have a choice over how we respond to life's twists and turns. Through our coaching sessions, you'll learn skills to help with acceptance of where you are now, emotional responsibility and how to exert your power of choice over how you react to the many challenges that life may throw at you.
Reflection, increased self - awareness and a real understanding of your core values can lead to a greater sense of empowerment and confidence to move forward with meaning and purpose.
stress and anxiety
"Stress is caused by being "here" but wanting to be "there"."
We are not designed to to cope with long periods of chronic stress . In our cave man days, natural selection adapted us very well, where short bursts of adrenaline enabled us to react quickly in the face of danger, but the stress response was related to specific circumstances and short lived.
Compare this to the chronic stress that afflicts us today. Our bodies remain on constant red alert in response to a vast array of perceived threats fuelled by a constant flow of adrenaline.
Unfortunately, the physiological effects of stress and anxiety are very real and are making us ill. Chronic stress affects all the systems in our bodies and can wreak long term damage.
Do any of these resonate with you?
High blood pressure, heart disease, panic attacks, migraine, insomnia, muscle tension, digestive problems, the list goes on......
the gift of now
"Be happy in the moment, that's enough. Each moment is all we need, not more."
Mindfulness is having your mind full of the thing you are doing right now in this moment and turning your attention away from the constant "chatter in your head". It is often termed as being "in the flow" - cycling, singing or dancing would be great examples. It is the quality of being present moment by moment . We were all masters of it when we were children.
Unfortunately, as we reach adulthood, we rarely live in the "here and now" and instead are caught up in our thoughts living in the past or the future, caught in a cycle of over thinking and being engulfed by constant rumination.
The good news is that we are not our thoughts and do not have to be ruled by the incessant chatter inside our head
thought and behaviour based approach to coaching
A cognitive behavioural approach underpins my coaching practice. Is is a holistic approach which has universal applicability and strong evidential grounding. The cognitive behavioural model emphasises that how we react to events is largely determined by our views of them, not by the events themselves. During the coaching process, you will have the opportunity to examine and reframe some your unhelpful beliefs and assumptions and develop and practice alternative viewpoints and behaviours that will prove more effective and empowering when facing life's challenges and when trying to achieve your goals.
To effect lasting psychological change you need to approach the coaching process with an open mind, commitment and motivation and be prepared to take emotional responsibility for your own life.
The ultimate goal of cognitive behavioural coaching is for you to learn the skills and tools and be confident applying them in your daily life as you become your own coach!